"What I wouldn’t give…"

I don’t know you anymore,
I don’t recognize this place,
The picture frames have changed
And so has your name …
We don’t talk much anymore,
We keep running from the pain,
But what I wouldn’t give to see your face again…

-Savage Garden

I like facebook. I love looking at pictures of people I used to know, people who I haven’t seen in a while. I like looking at how they’ve grown, how they are no longer that goofy chubby kid I went to middle school with, how they actually got kind of hot since I last saw them. I draw conclusions about the photos–“so-and-so has definitely gone downhill since we used to date,” or “wow, I bet he doesn’t even remember me, he looks too happy.” Sometimes it makes me miss them more, sometimes it reminds me of the reality of this or that incompatability, grounds me into the reality that he wasn’t really as perfect as he always has been in my imagination, it makes me remember what I always used to try to overlook and forget. Sometimes it makes me feel just inadequate–why on earth would they want to remember me when this is what they have now?

Sometimes I look at photos of myself, and try to imagine what those people would think of me. It is important that I look like I can have fun, like I do have fun, like I don’t take myself too seriously, that I have a lot of different kinds of experiences, that I have inside jokes and close friends.

Most often, I just look ridiculous.

I don’t know what they see in me.


~ by kiranapoleon on January 14, 2007.

2 Responses to “"What I wouldn’t give…"”

  1. <3

  2. <3

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